Be Expectant Without Expectation

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right path.” (Proverbs 3:5-6, HCSB)

What lies on the other side of the open door? Can you be expectant of what is there without an expectation of what it will be or should be? And what is the difference?

Early in my walk with Jesus, when he opened a door, I jumped to a conclusion of what the outcome would be. Or at least the general direction the path would lead. I was expectant that God was moving and had a plan. But I also had a certain expectation of what it should look like.

When it did not turn out the way I thought it would, I began questioning whether I had heard from God. Or, was this a course I plotted on my own, driven by my flesh?

Doubt and discouragement soon followed.

Over the years, God has allowed me to experience these situations that left me to question him and myself. Proverbs 3:5-6 was given to me in my early twenties by my sister when I asked for advice. I did not have a full understanding of Jesus at that time, but the verse resonated with me. Trust God fully. Do not trust my own ideas. Acknowledge that God knows best and he will show you the way. It is simple if you think about it.

But not trusting my own ideas is counter cultural.

The world tells us to “name it and claim it.” A popular meme is “She believed she could so she did.” Sometimes in life we need this type of self-talk for our confidence. But I am specifically talking about when we hear a call from God to move.

It took a while for me, but I finally learned how to “not rely on my own understandings.”

Here are a couple of examples:

In 2018, God opened a door for me to take a meeting with the full administrative team at the school where I was employed. The table was full of men and women with distinguished academic pedigrees. Dr. this. Dr. that. Dr., Dr., Dr., and Jill. I went to pitch an idea God gave me to bring spiritual encouragement to the staff at the high school. This was God’s idea, and he opened the door for the meeting. My expectation was that they would say yes.

It was a no.

I walked to the car questioning whether I had heard from God. And, did I just make a fool of myself? God had opened a door and I became expectant of what he would do. I also had the expectation of a “yes” answer. Because, what benefit would a ‘no’ be?

In that moment, God showed me the reason he wanted me to take that meeting. He said, “I want you to realize that you have a seat at any table I call you to.” I heard that and said, “Yes, Lord.” I then started to prepare my heart to receive what may come in the future.

In 2020, God called me to attend classes at College of the Ozarks with an Associate degree from the 80’s in my hand. Again, I was expectant of what He was planning to do. There was a common-sense expectation that it included a graduation and diploma. After three amazing semesters of study, he called me out of the classroom.

I battled that decision. Is this from God, the enemy, or me?

God spoke again, “What if coming back to school had nothing to do with getting a piece of paper in your hand at the end?” Those words may have well been audible. They were crystal clear. So, out of obedience, I finished the semester and was done at school.

While waiting for the next assignment, all God had spoken was, “Sell your house.” Terry had just retired from education, so we put our house on the market and waited. This time, I was expectant to see what God was going to do, but with zero expectation of the outcome. I did not rely on my own understanding.

Our house sold, and I took a job at the same college as a Resident Director of a girl’s dorm. We moved on campus for a year.

Through these experiences, I learned how to be expectant of God’s goodness without certain expectations of the outcome. If I believe he is fully trustworthy and has a better plan for me than I can even think up, life becomes a grand adventure. I can face life with an expectant heart.

Are you ready to experience the fullness of God? An obedient and expectant heart is what he desires.

© 2023 – Jill Jamieson – All Rights Reserved.

Read more about trusting in the fullness of God in my book: Secrets of the Little Green-Eyed Girl: Digging up the Roots of Shame and Guilt.